Saturday, October 31, 2009

I Cannot Understand This

Have you read about the 15-year old girl that was gang raped in Richmond, California? AWFUL. It is making me lose my mind with anger and sadness. To read about it, click here.

I just cannot fathom how so many people participated in the brutal rape and beating of this young girl and that so many witnesses stood by and did NOTHING to stop it. How is that possible? How do so many on-lookers witness such an event, cheer it on, text people about it, take pictures of it, and not try to stop it? How is that possible?

Years ago I worked for a non-profit organization and I discovered my boss was embezzling funds. I was the lucky one that got to gather evidence and present it to the top. I was young and terrified, as I thought my boss (the embezzler) would find out what I was up to and try to fire me or do something worse to me. But I knew it was the right thing to do, so I went ahead and reported her.

After the embezzler was shit-canned and everyone pretty much knew what had been going on, a co-worker told me that she was sad to hear about it, and that she would miss her friend (the embezzler). This co-worker told me that "you can't judge people by their actions". I could not understand that statement way back then, and I still cannot. I think actions reflect character.

I realize these two stories don't have much in common, except that when witnessing a horrible situation I'd like to think that most of us would try to do the right thing. Why did all of those people rape that girl? Why didn't any of the numerous witnesses try to stop it? I just cannot wrap my head around it.

41 comments:

alissa said...

OMG i read about that. insane. who are these kids to just stand there? not one of them feels anything - so scary

Jill said...

I just read this stupid historical novel that a friend insisted that I read. Lots of raping and pillaging in twelve century England. I was disgusted by the lack of humanity...and it's still fucking going on today!

Fashion Court said...

i'm taking criminology this semester and we were talking about this. so horrible. you would think that one decent person would use their cell phone and call for help.

kys said...

I hadn't heard about this until I read you link. It's awful. I don't know if I'm feeling more anger or sadness? How could they all just stand there and watch?

Chessa! said...

It's so awful and disgusting. Lack of humanity doesn't even begin to explain this. these people are animals.

blueviolet said...

I couldn't even believe that story when I heard it. It's beyond horrible.

People's actions are indeed indicative of their character. I'm not sure what that person was talking about. I'm with you.

Diane said...

everything's backwards here!! i'm not good with change, you know! lol will take a minute to get used to.

i could probably write an entire paper on the subject at hand and make a decent argument for both sides.. only because #1, i really wanted to be an attorney, and #2 someone very close to me, who is a very good person at heart, does a lot of bad things. not of this caliber of course, but it's just a jumping off point, ya know?

so.. most people who do things like this were victims themselves and/or their emotional growth was arrested for some reason or another.

personally i'm disturbed most about the "non-perpetrators" doing NOTHING to help this girl.

as for the accused, i'm fairly confident in assuming they are not incapable of knowing the difference between right and wrong, and they need to be held 100% accountable for their actions. because, although there are REASONS why these things happen, there are no EXCUSES - it was a choice, and yes, they should be judged by their choice in actions. i'd hate having to defend them in court, but i think it's a good guess that something, somewhere along the way something's just not quite right with them - how they grew up or perhaps a mental illness of some sort. they certainly do not need to be out in society. and i hope that everyone who was there and did nothing have a very difficult time sleeping at night.

unfortunately sickness spreads, and that's exactly what happened here...

i hope this girl chooses to be a survivor and not keep letting the sickness spread even more.

sorry so long... this has been on my mind a lot the past few days.

Diana said...

ugh, this makes my stomach churn, and it def was not the Indian food i just had.

my old best friend did something horrible like this and even though she is the same person, i can never ever look at her the same again. i don't think it's judging, it's just the truth and i didn't want to be around her.

Simply Mel said...

This has made my stomach turn from the moment I heard the news. What I cannot wrap my head around is the extreme non-conscience of the people who just stood there. And the poor girl who will forever never be the same and will always be haunted and ripped apart because of this cruel, sick, disgusting act of violence.

Actions to speak much louder than character, and basically, your actions define your character.

I'm beyond proud of you for taking the high road even when scared shitless - your honorablecharacter has been established!

DesBisoux said...

I haven't read the article yet but I will.

And of course your actions speak for yourself! If they don't then what does??

I think it was very courageous of you to do what you did because it must have been scary and stressful. Your actions DO show who you are.

E.K. said...

Horrible. I couldn't believe it when I first heard it. It's so wrong.

Kaz said...

oh. That makes me very sad

Mama Kat said...

It amazing and sad that people can hurt other people so easily. Sick.

Mama Kat said...

It amazing and sad that people can hurt other people so easily. Sick.

TERI REES WANG said...

Horrid! Horrendous! and Horrifying!

We can collectively meditate and pray and dream for her spontaneous healing, so that this event does not define any other feature damage.

Character always counts.

bananas. said...

oh lady i am so with you. i canNOT believe this happened. the poor girl!!! i just could never imagine...NEVER! and what the hell is wrong with those 20 something people who watched it happen and DID NOTHING! NOTHING!!! it blows my mind...

and yes actions speak louder than words. don't judge? HA! HECK YES I WILL!

i hope they catch every single person involved.

Sam said...

Yeah - we have cases like that here - gang rapes and the S**** who are accused and guilty use every ploy under the sun to delay the case and drag it out for as long as possible - and the legal system just lets them do this - and the victim is harrassed and has to go to court every day for like forever until it's over...disgusting times a million. ...and then when eventually they are charged they get three years or something trivial...makes my blood boil.

Sounds like the "friend" of the embezzler has some issues with morality...I wouldn't worry too much about it - just give her a wide berth...

Alicia (The Red Deer) said...

You can totally judge a person by their actions - they speak louder than words.

Char said...

well, the person that said that is an idiot. yes, actions are exactly the measuring stick of a person.

and yes, i heard. it is sick and i hope they go after the onlookers just as much as they go after the rapist.

Stephanie said...

I commend you for turning your boss in. That took a lot of courage. A kind of courage I wish I had.

I am horrified by what happened at Richmond High. I feel so sad for the girl. How does one recover from such a trauma? It's like life during war time. How can you heal from that? How?

Trixie said...

That make story makes me sick. People are strange. They can get into a "don't involve me" mentality that's mind boggling. I watched the video of the two women fighting on a bus and nearly everyone is the bus is turned away from them not getting involved. It's really sad.

That's impressive that you turned him in. Good for you!

Toothfairy said...

horrible... I don't even get how ppl can act like that, it's evil!

I think it's good that you've reported her, you did do the right thing, but just like you, I would have been terrified as well!

*loves*

Jessica said...

When I heard about what happened I just could not believe it. I do not understand how a human being can do that to another. The fact that many people partisipated is disgusting. What that poor girl went through is torture of such a cruel magnatude. It's an example of the human race and how we are not all that we think we are if things like this are going on.

Summer @ B is for Brown said...

I am at a loss for friends. I actually have tears in my eyes thinking what this poor girl went through and now knowing that people were there and COULD HAVE helped her but did nothing. The physical and emotional scars she will have to endure make me so angry.

Thank you for posting this. I wish there was an awareness group for this but then again, why do we have to teach people to be kind to your neighbor and to help someone out when they are being harmed?

I am disgusted.

Summer @ B is for Brown said...

I meant I am at a loss for words. Not friends. Sorry.

Sher said...

so hard to fathom there is that much evil in the world. Or there are people in the world who are numb to it.

Kristin said...

I was literally sick to my stomach when I read about this the other day. The perpetrators and the witnesses have stolen something from that poor girl that she'll never get back. It is truly beyond comprehension.

Andhari said...

This really makes me mad. How could people just standby? If I was there and had a car I would so crash it at the bastards. Or damn, I wish I had a gun too.

I can't tolerate these behaviors at all. I say this deserves death penalty but I heard you guys don't have it over there anymore? it's too bad but when people they do something like this, they have no business to exist anymore. Such an inhuman behavior!

Girl Japan: April Marie said...

who stood by and did nothing are just as guilty... and they can be charged, no one called the police? no one?

E said...

Wow, it's like Kitty Genovese all over again. It's so awful that we have to pass a law to get people to help their fellow man and do the right thing. Apparently it's not working so well if this stuff is still happening.

Jenni said...

I did not hear of this story - but after just reading it it breaks me heart. That is horrible and terrifying. So sad how bad some people are in our world.

And I couldn't agree with you more on your statement "I think actions reflect character." I'm a strong believer in this and I'm glad that someone else is too.

Down and Out Chic said...

what DO we judge people on BUT their actions? can we judge another's heart??? i don't think so. all we have are the actions and we make judgements whether we like it or not.
as for the gang rape, i've talked about this a few times this past weekend with friends. it's SICKENING. i can't imagine being the parent of one of the kids that just stood by and WATCHED.
i've been in a "group think" situation before and i can honestly say that i DID something and i would do it again. i was the only one and i literally ended up with BLOOD all over my hands but how more people didn't stop to help made me cry and cry. ugh, it's making me sick just thinking about it.

Eva Internazionale said...

I think you can only judge people by their actions.

Gabby said...

If we don't judge someone by their actions, what do we judge them on? This is such a sad, disgusting story. I'm trying to think of a reason why no one helped her and I just cannot.

Hanako66 said...

I can not come up with a single reason that this was able to go on...I've heard of peer pressure, but come on. It makes me sick, we have these kids tried as adults...no way a monster that can do something like this as a teenager can ever be an upstanding member of society.

Iva said...

I can not find words right now. I'm literally in tears. I can not believe 10 participated and 20 watched!! My heart is breaking for her. ALL of these people, all 30 are horrible, evil, wretched, heartless...I could go on and on and on about this. They will never get what they deserve to get, after doing this to her. No punishment will ever be punishment enough. I am furious over this.

Phoenix said...

This sickens me. You can abso-fucking-lutely judge people by their actions; in fact, that's all you SHOULD go on.

Sometimes this world needs to be more black and white. I'm so sick of gray moralists trying to find any fucking excuse for horrible behavior by saying it's just society's rules or whatever other bullshit people can come up with to be evil assholes.

Sorry to swear so much, super pissed about this.

Charlotte said...

What you did was courageous, character totally counts and I live in the bay area where this happened. Richmond is messed up and out here in the burbs people want to think that something like that couldn't happen. That it must be some poor black/brown people kind of thing. I think it could happen at an all-white, suburban high school. And I will raise my kids to be the ones that use their cell phones to call 9-1-1 instead of using their cell phones to take movies of the rape. It sickens me beyond belief. Unfortunately the law here in Ca. is that the bystanders can't be charged w/ a crime, which I will think will change after this case. Also I believe the # of arrests went up to 7 today,he is 21 years old. Even the minors arrested are being charged as adults and are facing a life sentence. I hope that happens.

sealaura said...

that was shocking and horrifying. I couldn;t believe it either. i do hope they get tried as adults. all I keep thinking is how awful, inhumane, cruel...

creative kerfuffle said...

i didn't click through to read the article--i can't read stuff like that. i also think actions speak volumes about a person's character.

creative kerfuffle said...

i didn't click through to read the article--i can't read stuff like that. i also think actions speak volumes about a person's character.