Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Girl Fight


The other day I was working at the gallery, and had to answer the door. When I was walking towards the door (which is glass), the woman waiting was staring at me and unabashedly looking me up and down. She didn't even try to hide it. She was especially staring at my shoes. Like I was wearing harp seal shoes or something. And when I opened the door for her, she sneered and said MY MY MY, THOSE SHOES ARE SOMETHING ELSE. Seeing as this twat is a frequent visitor and friend of my boss, I had to be nice so I smiled and said AREN'T THEY FABULOUS?! She did not respond. My brain exploded with the following thoughts:

1) Fuck you, you cheap hooker.
2) Don't even get me started on your cheap ass witchy kitten heels from the 90's.
3) If we are going to get into your hair and makeup, you are THROUGH.  
4) You wear those same stupid-looking Levi's bend-over black slacks every time you come here.
5) Fuck you and your fake hoity toity accent that fades in and out when you don't think anyone is within earshot.  Don't think I'm not on to you!!!!

I know I'm a mean and catty bitch, but I cannot STAND when women do this type of stuff. And if I get mad at someone and start picking them apart, it is OVER. 

All I am saying is that if you like somebody's outfit: COMPLIMENT THEM. If you DO NOT like somebody's outfit, don't stare at them and be a dick about it. I mean COME ON. At least have the courtesy to talk about them behind their back.  Or on a blog.  LOL.


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73 comments:

Morgan said...

This post is why I heart you so much. :)

morgan said...

Hahahahahahahahaha!

Hal said...

I love you and your new layout as well! Keep blogging like this. xo

HALCOHOLIC.com

bananas. said...

OH! OH! i hate that shit!!! like ready-to-pounce-and-attack hate! grrrr. WTF is their problem! what happened to smiling and talking shit in the mind...that's what i do. oh and don't get me started on tearing people apart. it comes naturally for me.

cerebral e said...

What if they're wearing those Nike gladiator sandals?

Once there was a really horrible guy at university and rather than say anything nasty to his face, I puked on him "by accident". Oh, those carefree student days.

Panty Buns said...

Uh-oh! i'd be more likely to give you compliments behind your back or on a blog, but in person i'd probably be staring, checking you out, and too timid to say anything. Wow. If that good-looking frequent visitor and friend of your boss got that kind of reaction, then, Yikes! Would i ever be in trouble. i'd better go hide in my closet.

everythingisjustwonderful said...

What a troll! I'm sure your shoes are fab, at any rate.

I was told I dress "crazy." What does that even mean? Should I be insulted? Women confuse me.

Georgina Dollface said...

Sometimes the best comebacks don't hit me until an hour later....which is probably a good thing for me AND the other person, 'cuz I can be really fierce sometimes. Being married to a man with an authentic British accent, I can not stand people who fake hoity-toity accents -they just sound ridiculous. - G

JenRem said...

This is the worst. Woman can be evil sometimes.

Anna Stelmakh said...

Oh, GREAT post;)

Down and Out Chic said...

ugh what a bitch. she can take her kitten heels and shove them.

blueviolet said...

I can not stand when someone looks you up and down. I will hate them for life if they do that.

Heather said...

It woulda been on like donkey kong for REALZ! Just saying, I woulda slapped a bitch!

Tia said...

Fuck her and her stupid shoes!! Knowing me I would have said something totally catty and rude, and would have later regretted it hardcore.

Len♥reNeverM♥re said...

she is leviwitchybitch*
excuse & pardon my french~

Caroline said...

She envies you. Bottom line... :)

Being Brazen said...

hahaha! I agree. Some woman are just nasty cow faces

Hanako66 said...

hahahahahahahaha!!

i hate women like that

L.A. Daze said...

Lol! I can't stand those women either. I think they suffer from a major insecurity complex, and that's why they have to act like that.

Chic 'n Cheap Living said...

Boo! You are awesome. She has no friends, just the Levi's slacks.

Trixie said...

You're not a bitch! SHE IS!

This is a big issue for me because I wear vintage so I get sneered at and stared at and commented on behind hands a lot.

People need to be nicer

Shorty said...

I want to see those shoes! Snap a pic and post it for your loyal subjects. I'm almost positive I will be drooling over them. They must've been very flattering to make the lady from the 90's so jealous!

Farah said...

I would so have the same thoughts running through my head girl! and nobody messes with my shoes!! ;) LOL

Kristine said...

Yuck. I hate the looking up and down and fake accents and little pointy heels and mean women like this. She is now added to my very long enemy list. Bet your shoes are awesome!

Shelley said...

Maybe she needs a friend to take her out shopping so she can get some shoes that aren't from 10+ years ago :)
I got Semi catty at a Panera Bread the other day. I walked in and it was DEAD in the place so I smiled and said "Hi!" to the cashier... who ignored me. She didn't greet me when I walked up to the register, instead she saw me looking up at the menu so the first thing she said to me was "Do you need a minute?" with a sneer. Hmmmm ok. She promptly walked away... and I looked at my boyfriend before she was out of earshot and said "wow! she was kinda rude huh?" She ignored us for the next five minutes (no joke) and we were still the only people in there who needed to order. When I saw her again she was pretending to be busy and didnt look at us so I said " When you are done we are ready to order." She rolled her eyes at me and took my order, which I decided to take home. WOW. Bitch much? Awesome. No worries btw They make the food where you can see it prepared :)

Melanie's Randomness said...

Omg I agree with you so much! I'm a big fan of "If you got nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all". That lady sounds like a bitch.

十十f十 said...

lol. classy.

Lynn said...

So. Did you take her down?

love jenny xoxo said...

haha, yank her hair out next time she comes to the office :)

todayandeveryday said...

O I would have paid to pull up a chair and sit with my chin in hand and hear you say just one of those things. But you handled it beautifully.
My retort probably would have went something like, "and so is that purse. We have it going on, don't we."

Cheer kitten,
~Dawn ;)

Vee said...

What a mean woman. I hate how women tear each other apart. We're all in this together, why not get along?

I once went into a boutique and the lovely Korean owner (I know for a fact that she is Korean) told me they may not have anything to fit my body type. Mind you, i'm 5'4, size 4, but I have hips and an ass. I so badly wanted to punch her, but I took my business a block down where the sales folks were lovely and I walked right past her store again with my three bags of purchases.

SabinePsynopsis said...

Okay, hun, I've changed my mind - you cannot go public with your blog, because HOW can you then write hilarious posts like this one?
Some people are just sad, aren't they. This kind of behaviour is quite common in Germany though, and I've learned to give them the tough up-and-down back - But I think your response was much better! Just remember: There is a really sad, unsecure, pathetic person living inside of her.

Iva said...

UGH UGH UGH!! I can not stand that!!!

and the whole fake accent things is totally irritating.

umm and another thing I cant stand? THE KITTEN HEEL!!! UGH!! they are not at all flattering. AT ALL.

SabinePsynopsis said...

... oh, and I will never ever dare to wear stupid kitten heels. (Don't like them much anyway)

...love Maegan said...

BAYAHAYAAAJ'LKSDJGLKAJDSFGLKAJSDFL


Literally LOLLED TO

1) Fuck you, you cheap hooker.


AHAHAHHAHA ...hate that bitch. always staring and making comments about my legs and shoes. and how she can't wear heels anymore ....how bout not wearing the SAME EXACT OUTFIT EVERY TIME YOU COME INTO THE GALLERY ...ugh, i want to punch her face just thinking about her smugness and that crazy hair. Covering my legs up !??!?! ...PSHAW!!!

C.B. said...

"1) Fuck you, you cheap hooker."
Ahaha! People, esp. some women, can be absolute dicks sometimes.

Christiejolu said...

GRR! I hate when women do this...I love that you called her a twat in your head! LOL!

Christy said...

Dear Drollgirl,
Thank you for being effing awesome. I am totally with you on all of the above! The next time some "twat" is mean to you... just remember all of the people who commented on this post... and know that YOU are the bees knees! ...and everyone else is lame.

Love,
me

anotherfishinthesea said...

Ha i have been really absent from blogging lately but just read through your last 12 or so entries that I had missed and they made me laugh my ass off. Thanks :) And also this woman sounds horrible, she should have a practical joke (a mean one) played on her.

adrienzgirl said...

Oh. No. She. Didn't!

I will cut a bish!

Erin Elizabeth said...

What a seacow!

But I have to say, I do love the comaraderie that this story has sparked in the comments. Nothing brings the girls together like taking down a big bitch. :)

fishy said...

I was on an elevator, eight months pregnant and was wearing men's overalls. A very well dressed woman got on and looked me up and down, pointed at my stomach, laughed out loud and said, those pants. I thought I looked cute, but she made me feel like crap. Evil women out there.

Kathryn said...

Wow, that was ugly on her part. Some people aren't happy unless they can darken someone else's day and she sounds like one of those. Sounds like you handled it well - people like that only feel good about themselves when they can make other feel small and if they know it bothers you, they just keep digging.

Phoenix said...

That sucks, Droll. What a slimy thing for one woman to do to another. Just remember that for one woman to go out of her way to try to make another feel bad about herself... she can't have the greatest self-esteem. So in the end, no matter what, she's the biggest loser.

Big Red said...

A-FUCKING-MEN!!! I hate that shit. Why can't we just talk badly about people behind their backs, like god intended?

hope505 said...

You are so good. The perfect, elegant response to that classless shrew.

"some people get jealous...they're talkin about me, but that's just cause they haven't got a thing to say." ~ sez the beastie boys.

Pretty Little World said...

People only make those kind of comments when they know you look loads better than they do AND they have zero personality. So while it's awfully difficult to see a bright side, here it is: she's a miserable human being and you're not.

Felicia said...

What did your shoes look like?? I'm the same way where I will rip you a new asshole if you try to step to me. Other bitches are just way too easy of a target!

creative kerfuffle said...

i hate bithces like that too!

K.Line said...

Now I want to see these freakin' shoes! And that photo of the first ladies is awesome.

Kitty Stampede said...

grrrr....girls can be such bitches. that is so much why i like to work independently or with men. I cannot stand snotty arrogance, it automatically makes an attractive person butt ugly. screw her, she's a total scumbag for acting that way towards the always awesome drollski.
i love the response you gave her, totally passive aggressive, killing her with kindness style. hehe.

Asylum Dolly said...

YOU are not the mean and catty bitch here!!!! All i can say is, you have waaaay more self control than i do, girl! I would've been tempted to give her a "closer look" at those shoes if you know what i mean. And what i mean is to kick that phoney ho in her phoney little mouth, and say " well well well,aren't all those broken teeth something else?"

well, y'know..i won't condone violence here, but yeah, that bitch is just being a bitch for the sake of being a bitch. There are full grown adults out there who unfortunately never grew out of middle school mentality. And she is one of them. She must be soooo happy within herself to go around being such a cock to people.

Considering she is a friend of your boss (so amazed that such people can actually MAKE friends?!) the fake nice thing was a good move. Next time she tries something like that, maybe you could say: "Oh My! What a blouse that is! Damn. i wish i could come with you! I ADORE 70's parties!Have fun!"

Heather Taylor said...

Girls like that can just go fly a kite for all I care. You took the high road Drollgirl, good for you!

Lorena said...

Ok, I hope you are preparing the shoe post, I gotta see these beauties.
Now, what a cheap ho.
No class whatsoever. You know you could deflate her car tires....or spit in her coffee... i got a truck load of ideas.

bravegrrl said...

haha! so funny! some women...

i just don't think that much about what everyone around me is wearing unless i like it...

Krystal said...

Um, that is just ridiculous. She's just jealous of you I bet :)

Martina Rosenberg said...

You are soo right and I am sooo with you ! I myself find it easy to interact with men but again, more then difficult to do the same with women. Most of them are on a level that they are bitchy, or try to make you feel minor, and much more. We in Germany call this ( rougly translated !!) "snappy like a mare" - and so true it is. With my way of dressing and looking I am "out" anyway, and the comments,glances and tilted heads of feminine (??) folks out there are common to me in the meantime.

Mrsblogalot said...

Here Here to #'s 1-5!!!!!!!!

Hey Is that Shannen Doherty Michele is staring down hard?

Haute World said...

Ugh, it just sounds like this woman is insecure and has a miserable life. I agree, she should just clam up. Or if she needs to take out her misery on someone, she should go jogging or have random sex.

Have you considered drugging her coffee? ;-)

Laura Trevey said...

You are hilarious!! Love this post ~~

xoxo Laura

Jill said...

I want to see the shoes!!

hope505 said...

Yeah, let's see those shoes!!
shoes! shoes! shoes!
*hahaha!*

asweetcakes said...

lol!! Girls are so so bitchy, it's unbelievable. I always try to compliment someone one i see they're looking good, and maybe i even copy them

Alisa said...

What is wrong with her?

That photo of Michelle and Carla is too funny.

You're Lucky I Don't Have a Gun... said...

michelle's face in that pic is fucking dreamy.

The Seeker said...

I never understood why women always pull one another hair when fighting...
That picture of Michelle and Carla is too funny, those expressions... lol

And I agree if you haven't anything to say at least don't stare.

But I think you should show us the shoes.... ;-)

Luv to u

xoxo

vint junky said...

Bi-atch!!
However i dot hink that type of behaviour is purely based on insecurity ....still a bloody cow though!

xxx

DON'T FORGET THE 'Y' said...

YOU ARE THROUGH! ahaha!

my brother reminds me regularly that i have the potential to be the meanest person he's ever encountered. i'm nice usually, but if you cross me, you're fucking finished. i can point out shit that people don't even notice. i think it's a gift we have.

Fancy! New Zealand Design Blog said...

Women are fucking bitches aye.

When anyone says barely-disguised-snide shit that starts with "nice" ("nice pants....") just say: "hmm thanks....NICE FACE."

On another note, I was checking out of hotel yesterday morning and the suit-wearing reservations man says "You look very tired this morning..." so I say
"No, I'm not tired. THIS IS JUST MY FACE".
And then I stare awkwardly at him.
Then I tell him he shouldn't say things like that to a woman, especially one he has never seen before in his life. (I was tired and a bit hungover, but DUDE!! Don't say that shit to ladies!)

God's Favorite Shoes! said...

You are officially been knighted my "wing man!"

If someone violates me, all bets are off. Seems like we live by the same code!

Karisa Tells All said...

wow i don't think I've even encountered someone so openly rude like that! What a dumb bitch. What shoes were they???

http://karisa-tells-all.blogspot.com/

The Empress said...

YES! I have got to start writing like this.

You are so very right. Why does the head to toe thing happen.

Just compliment the person, you don't have to exchange personal info., just compliment them.

Came over from badwords. Really like it here.

Diana said...

Some people's insecurity are more transparent than others.
Women like this are not my friends!!