Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Womanizer

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Every now and again I see this car in my neighborhood. I keep telling myself that I need to come up with something really clever to say in the event that I ever actually see the total fucking yutz that drives this vehicle. So far I haven't come up with anything really great. That is so unlike me. HA. Any suggestions?


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42 comments:

Dancing Branflake said...

Ask him if he likes Britney Spears.

everythingisjustwonderful said...

I would just crane kick him right in the face. No wit necessary, only a Karate Kid movie marathon to AMP UP.

L.A. Daze said...

Gag. What a douchebag.

God's Favorite Shoes! said...

Maybe the owner of the car is a top seller for Mary Kay? No?

bah!

cerebral e said...

It reminds me of how some feminists spell "women" without the "men" (so it's "wimmin" or "wimmyn" or something). Maybe by leaving out the "e" he is identifying with feminists to make a statement about the oppression of women. Maybe he also substitutes "herstory" for "history"?

Do you call these "vanity plates"? I've read that in American books. We call them "personalised number plates" in Australia but I think that "vanity plates" is a great name because it is quite pejorative.

The ones are really hate are where there is an "8" substituted for the "ate" syllable. Especially "XLR8". You're just asking to get pulled over by the cops all the time. I just H8 those degener8 number plates.

Chic 'n Cheap Living said...

I have no good response. Just eww.

Lorena said...

Have you thought this car may actually belong to a woman.... ? Who adores Britney ?
Hahha, yeah right.

Ren- Lady Of The Arts said...

That is FUNNY! What self respecting woman would ever go for a ride with him?

Stacy Conner said...

You should tell him maybe he wouldn't have to advertise his services if he drove a better car. A Maserati or a Ferrari scream womanizer. If you drive an old Caddy with chain link license plate frame, you need to market yourself with a a vanity plate.

Eden said...

Lawd. I bet when you see this wannabe, he's probably a runt with two teeth and bad BO whose chatup line revolves around his licence plate.

On the other hand, it'd be hilarious if this was attached to a family car. Though if I was wifey, I'd be utterly mortified.

...love Maegan said...

omg it's REAL?!?!?! AND IN YOUR HOOD?!?!? lol.

Chuck Bass

Fragrant Liar said...

How about flashing your own license plate that says: MNEATR

Alisa said...

Loser.

Do what my sister did to a friend as a joke, when the car is parked, add a temporary bumper sticker that says "Honk if you love to masturbate".

Her friend drove all around all day (he is a wine rep), not knowing why people were honking at him. He didn't find it until the evening.

girlunwinding said...

Really!? in this day and age with quality programing like the "Bachelorette" and "Big Brother" how could one even think to proclaim themselves as such an archaic beast?

You could just introduce yourself as Lorena Bobbitt. That ought to do the trick ;p

~Dawn

bananas. said...

i'm obsessed with personalized plates! i atually play the out-of-state plate game with personalized plates all the time. i have yet to see one as douchey as this one though. wouldn't it be awesome if it was driven by a woman? i actually would like to see that.

Down and Out Chic said...

oh classy, really classy. i hope you honor of meeting this d-bag just so you can tell us what he's like!

Ellie Grace said...

I would try and work the term "man-eater" somehow into the conversation. Whether it is keying it into the side of his car or saying it after you spit on his shoe or something...

SabinePsynopsis said...

2 thumbs up and a dirty grin? - That should frighten him.

Missy said...

WoW! I bet he is a lonely man...

Phoenix said...

I bet he picks up lots of chicks that way. I mean, what self-respecting woman wouldn't want to jump that as soon as she read his license plate?

I have "You are a Douchebag" cards to leave on cars when they are parked like idiots. You could totally put one of those cards on his parked car.

Susan Erickson said...

he must be a little slow or something...single is certain! He also must wear a lot of plaid....and stinky shoes for sure.....

adrienzgirl said...

Classy. Must be a real keeper!

♥Aubrey said...

What a douche-bag!!!
Think he's married...NOPE

Heff said...

"MANH8TR".

Lianne said...

UTHNIZM -- just write it on the back of his car in big black letters!

Caroline said...

I wish I had something cleaver to say...have you ever seen the person who drives this car? I have feeling that you might not want to mess with that... just sayin'

R said...

Excuse me? Are you Mr. Lonely? Sorry, my mistake.

Katie said...

love the silver chain around the plate.

p.s. are his plates expired?! must have retired from being a wmnyzer.

blueviolet said...

We know one thing. He's classy.

The Zhush said...

Ask him if he's seen your vanity plates? And then tell them they say:
URANAHOLE! Then sweetly tell him how hot those chains are around his own plates. (eeeewwwww)

Kathryn said...

I have found with guys that have vanity plates like are advertising for what they aren't...have read to many self-help books that tell you to "fake it you make it" crap.

I would probably look at him, look at the plate, look at the plate, let out slight stifled laugh, scowl the drive away.

Ren- Lady Of The Arts said...

Really nice of you to leave the comment re: D.L- I would love to read your post about him!

Ana said...

That kind of public cry for attention just means he's inadequate in other areas.

"Bet you pick up a lot of hookers with that, eh?"

Iva said...

imagine how far would your jaw drop if it was a girl driver?!

Ashton King said...

That's pretty funny. I saw one the other day that said "THX2MYX". I literally lol'd.

Miss Caitlin S. said...

hahah just give him a link to your blog post... what a loser, who would spend extra money on that?

Sam said...

Man...he would have to be a major piece of work to drive around with that on his car. Words would fail me! I'd probably just glare at him really hard!

The Savage said...

Hows about... well damn.. never mind.. I got nothing...

Haute World said...

You just know that someone who feels the need to put that on a license plate is anything but a womanizer. How very sad. I'd wait to see what the douche looks like. If he's really fat, bald and ugly like I suspect, you probably don't have to say anything... just feel sorry for him.

Candice said...

I bet he's a real stud. No seriously..

Kitty Stampede said...

hmmm...i wonder how that's working for him. you gotta stalk this douche down and get some photos , exploit the bastad..hehehe.
that whole playa thing is so, so lame.

Kristine said...

So I read this blog entry and then I went for a pathetic jog. (I am trying to take up running again and I am only managing to do the old man shuffle at this point)All i could hear was Britney spears' Womanizer going through my head, the WHOLE TIME. Next thing you know my bowels are seizing up and I had horrible cramps and I had an even more pathetic run than usual. I blame the douche with the vanity plate. Please find him and drop kick him for me.