Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Drollgirl's Baby

Rosemarys+Baby+poster, drollgirl's baby


So I am single and 40 years old, and it pretty much seems like I am not going to have any of my own kids at this point. This is kind of a good thing, as I think I would lose my mind if I had a kid that was like ME. HOW ANNOYING! Or my spawn might even be worse than me, something akin to Rosemary's Baby.  THE HORROR!!!

Most times I am okay with a kid-free reality -- I can barely manage my own life!  Yeesh!  Every now and again it makes me a teeny weeny bit sad, but that usually passes pretty quickly.  I have discovered that being kid-free has its perks, particularly in the singles department. It is an awfully convenient crutch/excuse when filtering out who to date and who not to date, or a quick and easy excuse should one need to bail on a relationship.  Oh you want kids?  Whooops -- SORRY!  On to the next!

Am I the only one that is forever concocting ways to get out of seeing a dude?  Am I the only one that likes to have a planned escape route JUST IN CASE?  [Side note and this is a repeat that long time visitors might remember: I went to high school with a kid named JUSTIN CASE!  LOL!!!] ISSUES!  Ha.

P.S. If you are young, you like horror movies, and you have not seen Rosemary's Baby, you really really should.  Maybe all the nitwit teenagers considering getting pregnant just to get on stupid reality tv shows should be forced to watch it too. 


Share/Bookmark

32 comments:

the eternal list said...

hi there!

signed,
mr. drollgirl

that's funny, 'cause i just saw that film recently, thanks to the fine folks at netflix, after years of people telling me how great it was. i have to agree, it's a fine film, it's nicely constructed, very stylized and just plain cool

Panty Buns said...

The mind can do some contortions trying to prevent perceived undesirable outcomes. I considered donating to a sperm bank for my own use, getting a sex change operation with a donated uterus and ovaries and then either impregnating myself with the sperm from my formerly male self or else being a test clone patiebt so I could give birth to my own child or to myself and be a single parent. With my luck it wiuld be the former option and the ovary donor would be Rosemary.

Brandi said...

I think we have all, at some point in our lives, have planed out an "exit" out of dates. I always say better safe then sorry. On a side note I am going to have the damn nursery song for the movie in my head all day!

Hanako66 said...

i feel ya.. i'm 30, have a bf, but still, i mean, realistically. i just. don't. know.

it makes me maybe a teeny sad, but it is fleeting for me as well when i consider the logistics.

Kimbirdy said...

i love this!! and i am right there with you on the no-kids thing. most people have a terrible time understanding this, especially people who don't live in big cities. everyone says "oh you'll change your mind," as if it's impossible for an adult woman in a committed relationship to choose a different lifestyle other than settling down with a house and little kiddies. but i've never wanted that, and i'm not going to change my mind. that life path just isn't for me and i'm SO happy with that.

sometimes i can't relate to people in blogland. it seems that all the bloggers are young 20-something's, super excited to be married and popping out babies. but not me. i love my partner, but i'm really independent and don't need him around very much.

so anyway, my point is, i'm so thrilled to see a blogger i really like be honest about these things, and sharing an awesome alternative to what i usually see. i highly support you!

Emelie - C'est LA vie said...

Well, if you DO end up with a babe, I hope he or she inherits your wit. You always make me laugh Drollgirl, even when you're semi- serious...
Xx

Morgan said...

Back when I was dating... I was known to 'irish goodbye' on dates. I would totally up and leave on them... without saying a word! I would go to the bathroom, and just decide I wanted to go home and LEAVE. Bad... baaaddddd. :)

liz said...

Rosemary's Baby is def one of my favorites ( f*** Polanski, but that's a diff issue)

I plan escape routes, my first date with my current bf, i had a friend text me an hour in, in case it was going badly. Luckily it was not.

I'm still unsure if I want children in the future, I figure it might just "happen" I can't see myself being one of those people who plan it

Caroline said...

Rosemary's Baby scared the crap out of me! Anyway...don't feel bad about the kid thing. It's not for everyone...trust me! ;) Maybe I should not say that as I have 2 kids!!! Whoops!

besswess said...

I feel the same way about children.....a tiny part of me wants one and then I think about it....
BTW...Panty Guy is crazy. Have you been to his blog?

SabinePsynopsis said...

Ha! Do cats count as kids? I've got one (kid), realized very soon: this is HARD, then had to find a decent man for us (got lucky there) and that was that. She's a gem though... and so much more sensible than her mum!

Char said...

Polanski knows his stuff - the movie still holds up. i used to be sad and stuff about not being able to conceive, but as i ended up divorced it worked out that i never have to see his sorry ass again. score. well, except you know, when he disses me in the deli.

bananas. said...

i watched that movie for the first time not too long ago. talk about WEIRD!!! but i did enjoy it...kinda.

as for men with kids...if i had met dave and found out he had kids, it would've been buh-bye in a quick second. no thank you! kids are a HUGE deal breaker.

TERI REES WANG said...

Years ago, I gave as part of collective baby tower of gifts to my very pregnant, very sensitive friend... a DVD of "Rosemary's Baby".

A lucky for me when she saw and heard all our other 'friend' gasp in horror, and trying to scold me...she smiled, and told me how I made her very pleased and happy. And quickly she held it close, and then dropped it in her purse..."Hee..hee".

You might want to try dating a guy with some teenagers, 'cause you know that could be big fun, and then you send them home.

Cheers!

Felicia said...

I could write a BOOK about this very subject, I'm not even kidding!!! I feel the same way about having my own kids. Plus, if it doesn't work out it's not something you can just return to the store. You are stuck with that horrible child for life!!!! Maybe I will start a blog series about these topics.

Dancing Branflake said...

More dating stories, please! You are so hilarious!

Prairie Chicken... said...

I'm 32 years old. Married for 9 years and still NO DEVIL SPAWN.

I don't know what it is.. but every time my husband hits that "magic moment" and asks me if he can officially make a deposit I find myself saying NO NO NO NO NO!

The fear is that one day he'll stop asking. Ok wait... fear isn't the right word. Relief when he stops asking? LOL. I'm still undecided.

Chic 'n Cheap Living said...

Escape route is always a must. You're just being smart!

WendyB said...

I've been loving this all day: http://mybabyisaverage.tumblr.com/

It's so the opposite of acceptable parental attitudes.

Jo said...

I'm with Kimbirdy, it is so nice to find a blogger that I can relate to as far as the whole kid thing goes. I admit, I like looking at the young 20something blogger/mommies amazing photography and happy scenes, but I have happy scenes of my own...just sans bebes.

Like you I get a funny little twinge now and then. My only concern is that one day I'll regret not having had a child. But, I keep telling myself that's no reason to have one.

Oh, and fear of commitment....let me just say that my boyfriend moved into my apartment in November. He is the first boyfriend I've lived with, because I was always wondered, "If we live together, how difficult will leaving be?" Well, so far, so good. One thing I have noticed, and I guessed this about myself ages ago, living together has pretty much squelched any desire for marriage I may have had...in a good way. I am with him because I want to be, not because I signed a contract. (And if I'm being honest with myself, living together is a lot less permanent and frightening than marriage when you are brought up to believe that marriage is forever.)

Wow...sorry for rambling in your comment section. Great topic!! Great post!! And, I am beyond happy to find like minded women here in blogland!

Christi said...

Oh dear. I'm 38, single and I want a kid! LOL

Alicia said...

oh lady, i often wonder what it would be like to be on the opposite side of the coin. i never thought i would have kids...then i got prego as a teen and that all changed.... kids or no kids, you're flippin awesome...and now i need to go rent rosemary's baby!!

十十f十 said...

just in case -> lol.

your post touched a nerve. these days i find myself more and more drawn to kids - more specifically, babes like my adorable niece. i get sad when i look back at the mess i've made these past 40 years. maybe that's why.. it's His will that i should stay single and childless cos i'd screw up more lives.

blog response: oops, my post's vague. i wish i could carry off the gamine/pixie look. but you know what? i once chopped off my hair and i received lots of compliments. i don't think i looked like a boy. but i was once told by some fortune teller that i looked like a man sometimes. dunno if he meant my appearance or my behaviour (??). i sometimes did wonder if i got more male hormones in me... haha.

Phoenix said...

I'm thinking more and more about not having kids these days, and so is my guy. We haven't fully decided, but we did agree that it shouldn't be my biological clock telling me when to have kids, it should be when we have the finances and stability, so hell, if that doesn't happen until I'm 80, I guess we'll adopt! :)

Sarcastic Bastard said...

I never wanted kids. I am too selfish. I married a guy whose kids were in diapers and stayed with him just long enough to get them off to college, and then we decided to divorce. Figures.

The guy I'm with now has no kids. Thank Christ.

Love you.

Kathryn said...

You just never know- I have worked with several women that said they started having their kids the same time her friends were becoming grandparents. The upside is you are more settled and patient - the downside and dang, they are hard to keep up with.

Nobody needs a man or a child to "complete" them - as long as you are happy that is what is important. Seen too many times where people have paired up and/or have kids because that it what was expected of them or they think that it will "complete" their rosy daydream of perfection and it is not what they really wanted and nobody ends up happy.

One advantage to dating when you are older is you know more of what you do and do not want in a relationship, not just react all hot and bothered based on looks, because when that fades, you really need to like the person on some level.

Pretty much for every first date I have had in the last 10 years I have tried to limit it to an hour at dinner. Nothing worse than wasting a complete evening with a guy that you know by the entree is going to be a one date wonder just out of politeness (or concern they will go postal).

Stacy Conner said...

I am not a fan of horror films, but I love Rosemary's Baby.
And I have to say, you get be an aunt, which is always much cooler than being a mom. Aunts get to have someone related to them, but none of the responsibility. Your nieces & nephews will never tell you they hate you. How awesome is that?!
The stork may never visit me either and I am content with that. I'm certain if I don't have kids that I will have fewer wrinkles. Call me shallow, it's ok, I totally am.
Happy Almost Friday!

Kitty Stampede said...

I am eternally on the fence of having kids. like one of the others said above, it's not like you can just take it back to the store. LOLOLOL.
i think i might, but at the same time i think of how horrible some things are and I do sometimes fear for the future, I don't care so much for me as I do for the kids. My mom said she thought those very same things...so who knows. She wouldn't blasted out me and my siblings..and so on..lol. and I like being alive.
who knows what will happen..

p.s.- maybe you'll meet an awesome doood through bloggings. hmmm...mr. drollgirl?! lol

Alisa said...

Yesterday I said (to myself) "I changed my mind, I don't want kids" That happens every once and awhile. (I have a 12 and 13 year old)

Rosemary's Baby, way to scary for me. Especially the liver eating scene, reflected in the toaster. Ahhh

tulpen said...

I know how you feel. I can't stand kids. I never want them.

Crap. Too late. I'm fucked.

Anonymous said...

Oh yes, the Kid Thing! I never ever wanted kids (oopsies), and pregnancy and childbirth sucked harder than an industrial strength vacuum cleaner.There is NO FUCKING WAY i will ever have more. I can barely look after myself most of the time, so the responsibility of having a kid is probably one i shouldn't have taken on, in all honesty!!!
Of course i love my kid to bits, don't get me wrong! But i probably wouldn't have become a mum if i realised back then just what a toll it would take on my sanity,and CERTAINLY wouldn't have had i known that a year or two down the track i would be doing it on my own :( But,i just have to soldier on, and be a loving ( if not quite sane or conventional) mother, and try to instill as much confidence and creativity in the little rugrat as i can ;)
Now, Rosemary's Baby. I have been too chickenshit to see it, because it sounds really fucking scary!!! A few months ago, i was sitting next to my daughter on the couch, and she looked into my face, and ever so calmy, said: "I'm going to kill you, mummy". It freaked me the FUCK out. I laughed and made light of it...but it freaked me out!!! I have actually woken up in the middle of the night to find her holding my nose and covering my mouth, and giggling... I guess she's just playing and doesn't really understand.....O.o But nothing sinister seems to have happenned since, so i guess it was just a stage she was going through ( that serial killer stage they go through..??)
Anyway, in conclusion to this longwinded comment, have you heard "Directors Cut" by Fantomas ( fronted by the lovely Mike Patton if you've not heard of it ;) ) because it is an album of versions of their favourite movie theme songs, and Rosemary's Baby is amongst them. It is pretty damn cool! Just had to mention it, as i know you're a fellow Patton fan, and methinks you might enjoy it :)

Bon, aka Asylum Dolly. ( used the anon option 'cos i clicked thru from facebook!)

vint junky said...

One of my all time favourite movies. Although i'm not to proud to admit that i am actually shallow enough just to watch it to marvel at mia's hair and her neighbours outfits ;)
x