Tuesday, March 25, 2014


My hairdresser (Jeannie) and I were talking about her brother, Jim.  Jim committed suicide several months ago.  

Jim was in his seventies, in poor health, and he suffered from severe depression.  He was in and out of mental hospitals in recent years -- particularly after his wife passed away -- and  he was on many medications.  He tried every treatment you can think of, including shock therapy. But nothing seemed to REALLY help him.  Eventually he gave up, placed a gun to his head and took his own life.  

Jeannie has been taking care of Jim's affairs after his passing -- first dealing with the shock/horror/guilt/shame of the matter, then notifying family and friends, then planning the funeral, then dealing with estate matters, then figuring out what to keep/give away/sell, then dealing with taxes, all the while trying to manage her grief.  Jim's sons have helped somewhat with these issues, and it has been difficult for all involved.  

Jeannie's husband dropped by Jim's house the other day and he called Jeannie to tell her that he found a mysterious box. He said that the box was sealed tight and that it had this message scrawled on it: "DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT OPENING THIS FUCKING BOX!!!"  After hearing this, Jeannie asked her husband, "Well what was in the box?!?!?!?!?!?"  Her husband yelled, "That's the difference between me and you!   I would never open that box!  I would never go against Jim's wishes!"  Jeannie thought over the situation for a bit, and ended up telling her nephews (Jim's sons) about it.  One nephew said he would go check it out the following day.  The next day Jeannie sent her nephew a text and asked him what was in the box. The nephew did not respond.  4 days later, the nephew still had not responded.  The whole situation was driving Jeannie crazy -- WHAT WAS IN THAT FUCKING BOX?!?!?!?! 

Now that I have heard the story it is driving ME crazy, and I won't even get to hear the outcome until I go back to get my hair done next month.  Argh!!!!!

Would YOU open the box??????  I would open that box lickety-split. I would have to know what was inside.  

This whole situation makes me think about what we leave behind after we die.  Someone will find our stuff.  All of it -- the meaningful, the meaningless, the scandalous, the good, and the bad.  YIKES.  I certainly wouldn't want anyone poking around in my stuff while I am living, but I suppose it is ok if they see it all after I am gone.  At least I think so.

Thoughts on this????

P.S. The boyfriend recently received a call notifying him that a family friend had passed away.  He expressed his condolences and asked if there was anything he could do to help.  He was told there was one thing he could do that would help SO MUCH -- he could come over and haul away the deceased's rather extensive 70's porno magazine collection before the kids and grandkids found it.  Gulp. 


Felicia said...

OMG that story is INSANE!! I think it would depend on who it was if I decided to open it or not. I obsess over my things in life AND after death. I have a document packet for putting together a living will because I also need SPECIAL INSTRUCTIONS on how to "dispose" of my body, etc....but when you actually sit down to write it all down it becomes too much so I haven't done it yet. But yes, I also don't need people rifling through my things after I die so I never keep things that would be too embarassing in that scenario.

KaH said...

Please keep us posted. So scary but so interesting. What could it be? My friends and I joke that we will we do a clean out for each other to eliminate anything embarrassing before anyone sees something they shouldn't.

Tiffany Kadani said...

I need to know what's in this box. I don't even know the guy and feel bad for him and his family, but my gosh that's just so intriguing not to be fascinated.

So now you have a big porno stash from the 70's?

Lorena said...

I would open it too, its quite intriguing- so i hope this post has a part 2.
I have seen shows where after people pass away their relatives find stuff hidden that you would not be very happy to share with anyone...
btw have you checked out the 70s porn ? and why would they call your boyfriend to pick these up?

Alisa said...

If he is gone, then yes I would open. He should have thrown it away if he didn't want someone to open it. I tossed all of my high school - college journals. No need for my kids to read those.

Kristine said...

You need to go back for a trim pronto!!! We need to know! I would be so torn but who am I kidding, I would tear that box open in a heartbeat. I used to have an arrangement with my roommate that if I died she needed to burn all my journals immediately. Not that there is anything particularly juicy in them, more like I wouldn't want anyone to know how boring I am.

Anonymous said...

I check your blog daily and am still dying to hear how this story panned out!

Jane Droll said...

Anon! Sorry I forgot to update this.

I asked my hairdresser about that damn box, and she had an explanation -- an explanation that I found rather disappointing. Lol. Clearly I have watched way too much Dexter and Hannibal!

Anyway, it turns out the deceased had a girlfriend. She had packed up a bunch of items, memorabilia, etc. and packed it up on a box, and then scrawled the nasty note on top of it.

For some reason I was hoping it was something more...INTRIGUING than that. Bummer. Or not! ;)