from Paris, Texas
Not that it matters, but I wrote this a few months back and for some reason or another didn't bother to publish it until now....
Have you ever seen the movie Paris, Texas? It is a strange movie, and I just loved it. The cinematography is outstanding. The acting is spot on. The story line is engaging. And, yep, it made me cry, but sometimes I am a sucker (particularly lately!) and just ready to release the waterworks. Side note: my theory is that tears are poison, and it's best to let 'em flow as needed before they turn into something worse!!
Harry Dean Stanton is the main character. For about the first 20 minutes of the movie he refuses to talk. I get this. Sometime I feel talking is overrated. It is so much work. So noisy. So much effort.
Sometimes I am a lazy communicator -- I just don't always have the energy. I like to think of myself as a word economist (LOL!), but that might be an overinflated description.
Example? I am not a morning person. It takes me a while to warm up and get ready to talk. The first person that I see on workday mornings is perfectly polite and always says "Good morning!" to me. I can't bring myself to utter that many syllables at 8:30am. I just can't. So I respond with a "hello" or "hi", or a hand wave and a smile. He doesn't seem to mind.
The other weekend I didn't really talk at all. Maybe a word or two to the cats, but that's about it. It was interesting. It was ok. Just sort of lost in my own quiet world. Being a freak, I made it my goal not to talk at ALL for the entire weekend. I was buying groceries late that Sunday afternoon when the cashier said hello and asked me how I was doing. I smiled. But that really wasn't good enough and he waited for more. So I told him I was fine, and that ended my not-talking streak for the weekend.
Perhaps this lack of interest in talking is hereditary. In her late 70s or maybe it was her early 80s, my paternal Grandma pretty much opted out of talking on the phone. My parents would call long distance, and my grandpa would talk to them. My grandma wouldn't. She begged off. She refused. Not because she was mad or angry -- I think she just couldn't muster up the energy to blab on the phone. She would send letters, but she wouldn't get on the phone.
My parents are starting to take the same tactic. They are not big on phone calls, and would rather email or text. I feel the same. Talking is so much work. Don't get me wrong, sometimes I can't SHUT UP, but this is usually when something great or exciting has happened, or I have a really good story to tell. Or when I've had an excessive amount of caffeine.
My co-worker has a 5-year old daughter named Olivia. Olivia is friends with a set of twins that sound interesting. These twins have selective mutism -- so they only speak in whispers. They whisper quietly when they are calm; they whisper loudly when they are upset. But they only communicate in whispers. This whispering takes place at home, at school, and when playing. Always. I think this is rather fascinating, and I wish I could see them in action and find out WHY they do this. The whispering twins' parents are not worried about their kids -- they figure this is just a phase that they are going through, and that they are fine since they are fully functional and able to communicate. Note: one of the parents is a therapist (not sure if that is good or bad!).
Which brings me to dating. And talking. The getting to know each other phase can be rather tedious. I feel like some people are really excited to talk about themselves. Me? Not so much. Getting to know people takes a lot of time and effort. Part of me wants to just hit the highlights on a sandwich board and point to the answers when questions are asked. How lazy is that?!
from Paris, Texas
Sort of off topic, but wondering if you talk about EVERYTHING with your significant other (or your insignificant other? lol). Do you lay it all out there, or hold some back? Do you pretty much reveal all of your deep, dark secrets and shameful admissions? Are you all in, or do you keep some things private? I'm just curious.